Growing up bisexual is a difficult thing to understand.
In many ways it’s more like growing up childless, because it’s the kind of thing that doesn’t really exist.
But growing up bisexual doesn’t mean you’re incapable of loving someone of the same sex.
That’s the point of growing up, not to be like everyone else.
It means you’re not alone.
“Growing up bi is something you don’t really feel like you have to deal with.
It’s something that comes from you being able to grow up in the right circumstances and being able accept yourself and how your sexuality fits in,” says Laura.
The idea of growing out bi is very different to the idea of having kids, but Laura still has a lot of questions about it.
“My best friend is bisexual and my best friend has a boyfriend, so I know I’m not the only one who’s bisexual,” she says.
“I still have a lot to learn about it.”
Growing up with two women has given Laura the opportunity to reflect on the pressures that come with being a lesbian, bisexual, or transgender person in Australia.
It was a time when many people felt like they could not be themselves, she says, when they felt like there was a lot more stigma around being gay or lesbian.
Growing up as a gay person is much harder than growing up as bi.
“It’s really hard to grow out of it,” Laura says.
The pressures are often on Laura’s to fit into society’s view of her, to prove she’s not just a person who needs to be loved, but also that she can be a good parent.
But while growing up with both men and women, she also had the opportunity and the strength to grow in her own way.
“When I first got out of high school I was really isolated and lonely.
I had this crush on a guy who was about six foot tall and he was a drag queen,” Laura explains.
“As a teenager I didn’t want to be around him, and as I got older I became more confident, and I also felt that I could be happy in my own skin.
I felt like that was an important part of growing as a person.”
Laura has a secret identity that she shares with her family, she’s been known as Lili, which means “love” in English, and is a name she has chosen for herself.
“Lili is my secret identity and I am very proud of it.
I’m a lesbian and I love to dance and I like to party.
I just love to have fun,” Laura tells 7.30.
“And I love my family.
They are very supportive, and they know that I love them and that I don’t hate them.
So they don’t treat me different from any other person.”
“When you grow up bi, you have a huge family to go to.
There’s always someone to talk to, there’s always a support system to help you through the process.”
Growing Up with two men Growing up being bi has made Laura a bit more cautious about the future.
She’s been given the opportunity by her parents to grow as a woman.
But she still hasn’t given up on being a woman, she adds.
“One of the things that I struggle with as a bisexual is the idea that you’re a lesbian or a trans person and you need to have two women around to support you.”
The pressure to fit in comes with the pressure to have a good life, and Laura has to deal a lot with the fact that she’s still learning.
“The hardest thing for me is that I can’t be a woman because I’m too old, I’m so old and I’m bisexual, but I still have to learn how to deal.
I have to find out who I am, I have no idea who I’m supposed to be,” Laura adds.
The pressure on her to conform is something Laura struggles with constantly.
“Every time I tell someone, ‘I’m a woman’, they get really upset and they don´t believe me because I’ve always been a woman,” she explains.
It takes Laura years to get comfortable with being who she is.
“Because I’m still learning to be a lesbian.
And I have always been able to relate to other people in the same way,” Laura admits.
Growing Up as a lesbian is something that Laura struggles and struggles with.
She has to find her own identity in life, but she’s also learning how to navigate those challenges in a safe, supportive environment.
“If you grow older as a transgender woman you can feel like, ‘Oh, I am just this lesbian woman,'” Laura says of growing older as bisexual.
“But growing up being bisexual is something where you have so much pressure.
It is very hard, and it takes a lot from you.”
Growing out as a trans woman is a whole different ball